techno girl? not in a million years, baby!

Belle de Jour explains how I also feel about technology much better than I would:
5 things I hate about technology:


* Ubiquity. Until 2002, I had no home computer and no home phone (or mobile). When circumstances forced otherwise, I realised I was losing my much-cherished Home As Hideaway ideal, and am still sad about that.
* Assumed ubiquity. I also hate how people assumed because I had neither a home computer nor a telephone I didn't know how to use one.
* Fakes, meta-fakes, and meta-meta-fakes. This bothers me more than a single bullet point's worth of summary, but ho hum. There are a shocking number of people who make money, not off developing technology or using it, but about talking about the people who develop technology or use it. Talking about the people who talk about developing technology or using it seems big these days. And those who discuss the cultural implications of talking about people who talk about the people who develop or use technology even seem to have their own conferences now. The content seems to me a lot like Wikipedia: broad, yet shallow. This makes me sad.
* Upgrades. I totally do not see the point of Microsoft Office and still wish for a word processor as good and with as many features as Wordperfect circa 1992. Yes, I also miss dot matrix printers, and those neat ones with little coloured pens. Sosueme.
* Cables. Ones I don't need or can't remember if I don't need them. Clogging up the place. Enough already. Mobile phone manufacturers, sort your shit out already. Everyone else, just start using Firewire and get it over with please.


5 things I love about technology:


* Multi-speed vibrators. So I don't use most of the settings, it's all about the fact that I could. This is truly the massaging shower head of now, amirite?
* Buying shit online. OMG, I can get a Jetboil replacement parts pack, an Elle Macpherson bra, and Life of Pi from the same website? Delivered tomorrow? Life. Is now. Complete.
* Never having to go to the periodicals section of a library ever again. Although I do resent the students of today for never having to know that particular form of torture.
* Spying on people I knew a long time ago. Way to go, Facebook. Now I need never give in to the urge to want to see them in person to discover how things turned out.
* Nanoparticles. Decades from now we will probably discover, too late, that they will kill us all. But fuckin' A. It's nice to live in an era where you can drop that word into conversation and people won't think you're a comic-reading nerd (even if you are)(fwiw I no longer have an active subscription to 2000 AD).